The reason nostalgia is a liar and a thief.

16/11/2017

The reason nostalgia is a liar and a thief.


Nostalgia is a fucking liar and a fucking thief. As of late, I've been reminiscing on my younger years; romanticising their glory and skipping over the painful parts that I've spent years trying to forget (or, more unhealthily, trying to ignore.) The thing about nostalgia is that it robs us of the present moment and makes us look at our past with rose-tinted glasses. It skips out all of the messy parts which separate the different versions of ourselves. When we look through our facebook albums or even if we scroll far enough through our Instagram grids we are reminded of every version of ourselves all at once: heartbroken you meets empowered you who meets drunk-crying-on-the-floor-cause-my-life's-a-mess-you who in turn meets this-is-the-best-day-of-my-life you then suddenly your entire being is overflowing with all of these contradicting emotions which then settle into longing for those 'better days' - the days where your friends were your family, when things were easy and you were ~happy~ (whatever the fuck that means).

I've decided to boycott looking at old photos for a while after publishing this post because I'm going to debunk my photographic memories and reveal the ~harsh truths~ if you will:


The reason nostalgia is a liar and a thief.

Perception: Oh wow I look so happy, this was when I went to Wales for Christmas/ New years and saw all of my old pals! Jeeeeze we look so young and carefree, I miss these guys I loved hanging out with them!
Reality: This was a taken just after I met my up with my first love and got officially dumped by him. He was the coldest I'd ever seen him and the smile in the photo disappeared into an ugly cry face as walked away and broke my knuckles straight after this photo


The reason nostalgia is a liar and a thief.

Perception: hahaha this was a fun day, me and her were best friends back in the day, we had such a good friendship look how close we were back then! Also lol I'm blonde, I haven't been blonde since I was 12.. fuck me that was a decade ago!
Reality: This was the last photo I took with my best friend when I lived in Wales. This day was the day I got kicked out and moved to Bournemouth. Our friendship was never the same again - none of my friendships was the same the moment I moved to Bournemouth.


The reason nostalgia is a liar and a thief.

Perception: oh wow I'm laughing, what was I laughing at? that must have been a really good day ha ha ha look how happy I look!!
Reality: This was the day my best friend and I fell out massively. I went and met her at the church in the photo and thankfully we sorted it out but moments before this we were both in tears.


The reason nostalgia is a liar and a thief.

Perception: Ahh this was a good day, we built a raft and won the challenge.
Reality: We were on a 'confidence course' with the school - I was there because I was self-harming every day and was severely depressed.


The reason nostalgia is a liar and a thief.

Perception: Wow this was my friends birthday, this was a great night hahah I used to get into the club underage, I was so wasted! I love my hair!!
Reality: This was my friends birthday, I had been out the past two nights and from this night on I drank pretty much every day for 2/3 months because my friend and I were severely depressed. I stayed at a friends flat on the floor and ate dry pasta at 3am whilst crying into the bowl.


The reason nostalgia is a liar and a thief.

Perception: Wow I look really nice! Edited a bit too much but I really like this photo, I remember I got that hat at a party I went to!
Reality: I'd just got out of a very controlling, mentally abusive relationship and so I went to a party and this was taken just after I'd got home from the party (where yes, I did get that hat - I still have it too!) I also kicked a bloke in the face and made his nose bleed because he tried grabbing and touching up my feet. I fell off a longboard, split my knee open and got stranded in a flat with my friend and a load of weirdos (one of which was the foot guy) - I hadn't slept in 2/3 days.


So all in all, looking at old Facebook photos is a laugh and reminiscing about old times can be nice and fun but you shouldn't wish away your days thinking it was better back then. Nostalgia is a fucking liar and you shouldn't entertain it for too long. Keep being in the present and keep moving forward.

What are you happy with in life right now?

1 comment

  1. You are so right. I often look at my past and sometimes think how much happier I was. I know for a fact that wasn't necessarily true. I could look back at some journal and actually see that I wasn't. I might have been even more miserable than I am now. Actually, I know I was. So why does our mind glide over all of our struggles of our past? Why do we look at the past in such a way that we actually miss it or wish we were back in that time period? Your post has made me think a lot. Great post love xxx

    Melina | www.ivefoundwaldo.com

    ReplyDelete

INSTAGRAM

© Arora Appleby. Design by Fearne.